The son called over this arvo with the grandson. He'd met with DHHS on Thursday with his ex. He's getting messed around a bit and the ex is trying to spike him anyway she can but he's learning how to temper his natural stubbornness and bad temper (NFI where he gets that from
) with some maturity. He's resorting to honesty.
Yes he did drugs, no he doesn't anymore
Yes he has a drink, but when he has the kid it's very few
Yes he's had mental health issues, no he's not on medication, yes he knows what to do if shit gets to him.
The kid demonstrates little desire to communicate with his mother, running to his room and hiding when asked to speak to her on the phone.
As far as DHHS is concerned, the kid stays with him but he was warned that because there's no custody agreement in place, once they back out he's on his own. He's still paying maintenance and she's still getting a single parents benefit unto they get their shit together and send him a fkn letter which he has to take to centrelink.
The plan at the moment is to get the letter, get some centrelink support like the family tax benefit, not paying maintenance and child care assistance, then claim custody and restrict her to supervised visits only so she can't take off with the kid.
Both of us are of the same mind, she doesn't really want the kid, just the money that flows with him. He's so far better off with his dad it's unreal. He is so good with him, better than I was.
Anyway. sorry for hijacking this thread every Sunday, there was a period of time when I was nearly ready to give up on my son, but he's pulled himself back from the brink and is doing well. I wouldn't wish being a single Dad working full time on anyone, it's fkn hard work and you don't get a lot of empathy, but so far he's managing it, his plans are good and he has a good (fare better than mine) support network.
All you (at least me) really want from your kids is that they grow up to be good people and are able to be happy, earn enough to provide for themselves and/or their family, be a good parent and raise kids who can do the same.
Every dead body on Mt Everest was once a highly motivated person, so maybe just calm the **** down.