Holiday Reviews

[stui magpie]

In the spirit of WPT’s great cycling holiday, I thought I’d share a bit about my recent short holiday up North in FNQ.

Feel free to add your own, give us some recommendations and observations. Thanks for the suggestion KenH.


Flew up to Cairns on the Friday before the Pies Geelong game, drove up to Port Douglas via a lunch stop at Palm Cove. I’ve been to Port Douglas a number of times in the past 25 years, this was my first visit since 2016.
I stayed at Mango Tree Apartments in Davidson St, 1.5km from the main village, the only place I could find when I booked. If you’re looking for budget family accommodation, it works. Functioning kitchen and laundry, nice lounge area, comfortable beds, WIFI, pool and tennis court (WTF?) but shower in the bath tub, no complimentary toiletries just a mini bar of soap and a TV smaller than my PC monitors. Still, I liked it.

Most of the village is the same as 6 years ago which was nice, the only change that made me sad was the old shop opposite the Central Hotel that sold all sorts of weird arse stuff has been bulldozed.
Up early on Saturday morning for a reef trip. 7:30 breakfast at the Marina of Chilli poached eggs (yum) then onboard the reef Sprinter before 8:30 for a trip to the Low Isles Lighthouse Island.

I’m a fan of the Reef Sprinter, it’s basically a speedboat that seats 12 passengers and gets the 15km from Port Douglas to the Low Isles in 15 minutes, you can be out, snorkel and back in less than 3 hours. I’ve been out to and past the Low Isles several times but this was the first time I got to set foot on Lighthouse Isle.

The island itself is barely 1 acre in size, with a beach made of (naturally) crushed coral on the north/west and black boulders on the rest. Apart from the Lighthouse, it has 3 uninhabited cottages where the lighthouse keeper(s) and families used to live and a residence where one lucky couple live now as caretakers. I say lucky if your idea of lucky is a living on a tiny tropical island with solar electricity but no internet, FTA TV, air-conditioning and very sketchy phone reception. The caretakers are apparently QLD gov employees who sign on for 2 year contracts. A long term married couple not long back only lasted 3 months, left the island and got divorced. Bit of a marriage tester.

But not as bad as in the old days when the lighthouse was manually operated (hence 3 lighthouse keepers) and had to be “wound up” every hour by manually hauling a heavy weight up to the top (while inhaling Mercury vapour from the lighthouse light fitting) which would make the light rotate as gravity took it down. (It was converted to Solar power and demanned in the early 90’s).

Combination of the isolation and perhaps the mercury vapor led to a few loose happenings. 1 lighthouse keeper killed his wife, the only grave on the island, another took off for the mainland in a rowboat with his kids and was never seen again.

The snorkelling off the island was brilliant. I’ve never snorkelled by walking into the water off a beach before, always just jumped off a boat and by Christ it was hard walking. I couldn’t do it. Shallow water, soft sand and flippers, I had to walk backwards until the water reached knee level then fall on my back, roll over and start swimming.

Last time I was up in 2016 was not long after a cyclone hit the Low Isles at low tide and decimated a lot of the coral. Then in 2017 and 2018 hotter than usual water temperatures led to significant coral bleaching.

Fun Fact, Coral often bleaches temporarily in summer, when the water is too hot the polyps go into hibernation and the coral loses it’s colour. Problem is, they can only do that for 6 weeks, if the water is still too hot, they die of starvation and the bleaching is permanent.

Good news is that in 2019 they had 8 metres of rain in the Daintree in 1 month which flushed a whole lot of cooler fresh water (and other things) out onto the reef. That, combined with cooler temperatures and no tourists due to Covid through 2020-21 and there’s lots of new coral growing along with all the stuff that survived. If you get a chance to do it, do it. Just floating over the surface looking down at the colour and movement is a brilliant experience.

Observation, the G string style swim wear is apparently back in fashion. Most of the 20 something women from various tour groups, whether bikini or 1 piece, had swimwear that looked from behind like someone was trying to bisect a beachball with dental floss. The Kardashian backside seems to be also a thing. One young woman, relaxing from her swim decided to lay face down on the beach beside her boyfriend with her legs slightly apart. As I walked past and saw her, my initial thought was , what a strange place to put a bike rack. You could have parked a Honda 90 there without using the kickstand.

Another fun fact, after the 2019 rains had finished, the tour operators went out to the island and we surprised to find several dead cattle in the shallows that had been washed out of the Daintree River and ended up there. The collection of Bull and Tiger sharks congregating for a feed meant snorkelling was off the agenda for a bit. No sharks today though, just lots of fish.
Back in town by lunchtime, light lunch and a couple beers, wander around, then back to the unit for a shower and change to get to the pub by 3:30 for the Pies Geelong game.

Great game day experience, bad result. Shared a table with a geelong supporter who was there for a 4:30 wedding. Few pre game beers, came back after the ceremony and left to go back to the reception. His partners bestie took a shine to me, taking a selfie of her and I when I wasn't looking. After spending over $100 just on beer for the arvo, decided to head home before things could get messy. Grabbed a pizza and walked back to the unit for dinner after the game and watch the next final on Foxtel Go on the tablet as the finals weren’t on FTA TV in Qld.

Sunday did a drive up to Daintree Village. It’s just a whistlestop, tiny little town but worth a visit. Walk down to the boat ramp and look across, at this point, the very narrow river at all the Angus cattle grazing on the other side. A tour guide years ago described them as the dumbest creatures on the planet. Bill and Ben, the cattle could be standing there drinking from the river together when a 5m Saltie suddenly launches, grabs Ben by the head and drags him under. Bill will just stand there, go “fk, Ben is gone, I liked Ben. Oh yeah, I’m thirsty” and just keep drinking.

Getting across the Daintree on the ferry was an absolute PITA. Get there early or don’t do it. Near an hour in the queue without moving. The woman in the car behind me was about to go into labour while we waited, but she wasn’t pregnant when we pulled up.

The drive up through the Daintree to Cape Tribulation is nothing short of brilliant. Everyone should do it once. Mossman Gorge is also another must do, I didn’t visit this time but have previously.

Monday down to Cairns, stayed at the Shangri La hotel along with the Australian Cricket team up the for the 50 over series against NZ. Very nice place, serious upgrade on the Mango Tree and short walking distance to more good restaurants than you could visit in 2 weeks. Completely different vibe to Port Douglas, but still a great place to visit.

So that’s it. If you made it this far, hope you enjoyed the read. If you didn’t you can go to stupidbastard.com.au to request a full refund or just add your own reviews.

[think positive]

Interesting!

The island sounds good!

Alone!!

[KenH]

Nice holiday review, this could be a good thing going forward. I enjoyed it.

If only I could have a holiday, sigh.

[Skids]

Sounds good Stui. Always been one of those places I was going to go to. My Uncle owned 5 units in a complex up there so accommodation was going to be a non issue... he recently sold the lot.

We will get there one day.

[stui magpie]

Thanks Guys,

Jo, you would love the island, alone, during the southern winter, with a DVD player and a stack of DVD's, not so much during January to March when it's 37 and raining every day and you had no aircon.

Ken, appreciate it, I tried to make it a bit like a review not just all about me, I'll change the thread title and hopefully others will add theirs

Skids, gotta get up there. It's just a beautiful part of the world.

[think positive]

I hate air con no matter how hot it is!

Sounds perfect!

[stui magpie]

I reckon I could do it alone for a few months in late winter early spring provided no tourists allowed for that period, after that I'd get cabin fever. Plus no way I'm staying there in the wet and cyclone season.

Did i mention that Steve Irwin died there?

He was skewered by the Ray at Battery Reef about 50km east, the lighthouse island was the closest place with a medical setup so they took him there where he died.

[Skids]

I hate air con no matter how hot it is!

Sounds perfect!

You would change your tune when it's in the 50's in the Gascoyne/Pilbara area. My A/C was on 24/7

[think positive]

Clearly we don’t get out enough!

[Skids]

Coral Bay.
If you haven't been there, this is a must see.

Daughter (Jess) and her boyfriend are almost set to head off on their 2 year trip around Oz in their van.

I finished off the plumbing and gas on the weekend and there's just a few more finishing touches; roof rack, solar panels and some trimmings inside.
The transformation of an empty shell into a motor home has been a great effort by both families.

First stop is 6 weeks booked in Exmouth/Coral Bay.... lucky buggers.

[think positive]

Nice skids, take care xx

[stui magpie]

Sounds awesome. I just booked in for a holiday to Darwin. Couldn't get the place I wanted to stay until September, so that's when I'm going. Taking mum up, her mobility is really deteriorating so this will definitely be her last holiday. Took her up there during Covid, she loved it, I asked her if she'd like to go to Port Douglas or Darwin, she picked Darwin.

Staying 4 nights at the Palms City Resort, which I love, then 1 night at Cullen Bay overlooking the marina and the last night at the Casino with ocean views. Can't wait.

[think positive]

Um. I don’t go anywhere in September!

Never again!


Enjoy!

Off to mermaid beach tomorrow, girls only! No kids, can’t wait! 3 nights and forecast 24 degrees when it’s 14 here!

This friend likes to walk. Last time we did 20k a day, one day we did 26! Coffee, walk to brunch, walk back, Friday salt spa day, walk to dinner! Repeat with shopping instead of spa for Saturday! She has a unit there so we can use the whole day, I’ll be onthe plane during the game!

Man I cannot wait to get on the plane!

[stui magpie]

So I'm back from 6 nights in Darwin. Loved it.

Took Mum up with me for the last time, since her capacity to walk has deteriorated I took the Wheelchair I picked up from the Thomastown Market instead of the walker, and wasn't that a smart move.

Firstly, shout out to Qantas staff. Instead of checking in online, I fronted to the baggage check in, got the boarding passes and checked in her wheelchair while they gave me one of theirs to get her to the gate lounge. First on the plane, last off, with a staff member with a wheelchair waiting for us.

We took carry on luggage, I put mums case on her lap and took the strap of an old laptop bag and used that to tie my bag to the back of the wheelchair so I could use both hands to push her.

4 nights at Palms City Resort, right at the bottom of the Esplanade and close to everything in the CBD. Beautiful surroundings, we each had a little self contained cabin/unit set in the middle of a tropical garden. Lovely. Last time I took her around all the tourist things, this time was relax. I'd get up at 6:30, do a 4km walk, home shower and breakfast then chill. Mum would get up at 9:30 and be ready to go by 11:30 so I had all morning to myself and she was more than happy to just sit on the deck of her unit and enjoy the surroundings.

The Esplanade is brilliant. It's a 1 mile long strip of park overlooking the ocean, with walking/cycling tracks, full of trees and shrubs, plenty of seating, great public toilets, and a kids play area that wouldn't be allowed in Victoria as well as public exercise equipment.

Hotel Darwin is great. It was 40 metres from our side gate. First night there, I was trying to figure out how to get mum up the front steps when a security guy came running over and took us in a back entrance that i didn't know existed. Thanks mate.

Watched the Pies game there Thursday night with a clutch of Pies supporters. Left at half time to watch the rest back at the unit only to have the bloke in the unti behind me come up behind me as soon as I'd sat down to ask If I could please come in and help him get the game on his TV as he couldn't drive the remote. Despite only wearing a pair of loose cotten boxer shorts I went in, apologised to his wife for my state of undress, fixed his TV, then went back to the game. Great win.

Took mum to Crocosauras Cove in Mitchell St which she enjoyed. Some seriously fkn big crocs in there and a nice reptile exhibit. Good family outing but a bit pricey for entry.

Checked out of the Palms Sunday morning and to fill in time before checking in at Cullen bay, took mum for a walk in the wheelchair. Covering around 8km in 2 hours in 30 degree heat pushing a wheelchair is a great way to get a sweat up. Wearing loose cotton boxers under denim shorts wasn't a smart move, I was wet from head to toe.

Toward the end of the stroll I was walking past The Rugby Shop in Smith St, great place for AFl/NRL/ARU clothing and spotted the same Collingwood Hawaiian shirt that a bloke had been wearing at the pub on Thursday night. Went in, only had one left, size medium, Bugger. Chick behind the jump told me to try it on, I protested that I was covered in sweat, she shrugged and said try it on so I did expecting there was no chance it would fit. Fck me, it fitted. Sold thank you, and half price as it was the last one.

Cullen Bay Resort, great view over the marina, a grassy area where you can chill and watch the sunset. good dining options. Had a magnificent prawn, avo and mango salad for lunch and with a shortcut through a bit of forest you're on Mindil Beach walking behind the casino in just a few minutes.

Last night was at the Casino itself. never put a cent into the pokies, again great service though. They put me and mum into rooms side by side, both looking out over the ocean. My room was ready first (well before normal checkin) but it had a shower in a bath, no way on gods earth was mum going to be able to get in there, so down to reception, new room for mum with a normal shower just around the corner, all sorted in 5 minutes.

Another shout out to Qantas on the way home, flight from Darwin to Sydney was delayed by headwinds, they seamlessly put us on the next flight, same seats, and got a chick driving an electric wheelchair thingo like a forklift to get mum to the gate lounge while I had to near jog to keep up. Business class is fun. In cattle class you have to ask for a drink, in Business it's "would you like another drink?". Hit Melbourne and we and some others with mobility impairments loaded into the golf cart from hell and fanged our way to the baggage collection area. We were out of there with all baggage before the rest of the flight arrived.

Mitchell Street is the main food strip and has a Coles, the Waterfront is reclaimed land with a whole bunch of hotels, restaurants, a wave pool and a free lagoon to swim in.

Stokes Warf is well worth a visit, grab a drink and kick back or get a feed or go to the RFD experience.

Darwin War Museum and the Experience centre up on East Point is well worth a visit too. Spent 2 hours there, could have easily spent 3 or more.

Love Darwin, beautiful weather in our winter, 20 overnight, 35 during the day, big country town feel and great people.

[Skids]

Good work Stui. A medium shirt??!! You're fading away!

Love Darwin, can't believe we haven't been back for 3 1/2 years.

Jess 'n Darcy just left the NT after 5 weeks in the van. They got some great shots of some magical spots.

Their next 3 months is house sitting in Victor Harbour. Darcy got work cooking at an old folks home. Jess is working casual at a child care centre and the Tavern. Scored a pretty schmick house, just have to look after the 2 dogs and keep the yard tidy... ha, those 2 keeping a yard tidy will be interesting!